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Thursday, July 16th, 2009
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12:24 am - insensibly the painter was led into confidences, and confessed his love.
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she had put him on the grass to cool him and went away only for a second; when she returned, she found no parrot! she hunted among the bushes, on the bank of the river, and on the roofs, without paying any attention to madame aubain who screamed at her: "take care! you must be insane!" then she searched every garden in pont-l'eveque and stopped the passers-by to inquire of them: "haven't you perhaps seen my parrot?" to those who had never seen the parrot, she described him minutely.
there is no longer any room for hope.
if we wish to be free-- if we mean to preserve inviolate those inestimable privileges for which we have been so long contending--if we mean not basely to abandon the noble struggle in which we have been so long engaged, and which we have pledged ourselves never to abandon until the glorious object of our contest shall be obtained -- we must fight! -- i repeat, sir, we must fight!
wednesday ci bis
current music: fools rush in (luka bloom)
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| Wednesday, July 15th, 2009
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10:57 pm - too good to not - crossposted meme
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the almost psychadelic change in perception, familiar to migraine sufferers as the first symptom of a new onslaught, was influencing his awareness, ringing everyday objects with a halo of imminence -- sadness, lurking peril, intoxication.
grab the book nearest you. right now.
* turn to page 56.
* find the fifth sentence.
* post that sentence and these instructions.
current music: i remember me/and all the little things that make up a memory (@london astoria)
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5:49 pm - terms of art (i'm an addict)
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moonlight tower
belt of venus
l'heure bleue
backstays of the sun
civil twilight
intercalation
lunation
collateral adjective
today is not the ides
current music: now here comes the world / here comes the moon and the sun
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| Tuesday, July 14th, 2009
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12:35 am - all of the stars are / wandering around tonight // we used to try them on
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"i have a great shock for you; i hope you are not so far gone in love as you pretended to be."
it was of no use protesting, against mrs. cadwallader's way of putting things. but sir james's countenance changed a little. he felt a vague alarm.
"i do believe brooke is going to expose himself after all. i accused him of meaning to stand for middlemarch on the liberal side, and he looked silly and never denied it--talked about the independent line, and the usual nonsense."
"is that all?" said sir james, much relieved.
monday ci ter
current music: forget about what i said
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12:19 am - after dinner
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after dinner, he had a book in his lap, but he had no eyes for his page: his eyes, in the swarming void of things, seemed to have caught kate creston's, and it was into their sad silences he looked. it was to him her sentient spirit had turned, knowing it to be of her he would think. he thought for a long time of how the closed eyes of dead women could still live - how they could open again, in a quiet lamplit room, long after they had looked their last. they had looks that survived - had them as great poets had quoted lines.
monday ci bis
current music: and then you whisper in my ear / i know what you're doing here
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| Wednesday, July 8th, 2009
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2:10 pm - term of art
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terroir
related: appellation (wine)
oh, for a bottle of wine with the appellation appalachian!
found wine from a lost vineyard
current music: les gouttes de dieu
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10:55 am - lost terms of art
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naïve ipse-dixitism
auto-icon
current mood: present but not voting
current music: old times there are not forgotten
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| Tuesday, July 7th, 2009
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1:17 am - rowdy roddy piper + gahan wilson + mononoke + rachel carson?
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current music: amuse bouche
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| Monday, July 6th, 2009
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12:19 am - and i've got the river / down which you sold me
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burning on
many of the plots
the dry weather favouring their combustion
sunday c bis
206 the art of living at the cost of others.
207 the folly of continuing too long upon the stage.
208 the rambler's reception. his design.
no. 34 folly of extravagance. the story of misargyrus.
39 on sleep.
41 sequel of the story of misargyrus.
45 the difficulty of forming confederacies.
the card on the far left represents the fourfold or mystical vision: still viewing through the previous three, we now add a spiritual element, revealing unseen aspects of the object. four of science (repose), when reversed: self-absorbed solitude or seclusion. forced withdrawal. brooding about something. depleted or fatigued by stress. avoiding action by drifting.
isolated during his life by his egoism, that egoism is now suicidal of his glory. on his tomb there is no proclaiming statue to repeat to posterity the mysteries which genius seeks out at its own cost.
in the second line, divided, we see the movement towards union and attachment proceeding from the inward mind.
in the fourth line, divided, we see its subject seeking for union with the one beyond himself.
and i am sure i was a fool to marry you--an old dangling batchelor, who was single of [at] fifty--only because he never could meet with any one who would have him.
we women, my lord, are fanciful in our choice --i had said now, to judge by the eye, there was no comparison to be held betwixt your follower and this gentleman. but varney is a well-spoken fellow, and, to say truth, that goes far with us of the weaker sex.--look you, master tressilian, a bolt lost is not a bow broken. your true affection, as i will hold it to be, hath been, it seems, but ill requited; but you have scholarship, and you know there have been false cressidas to be found, from the trojan war downwards. forget, good sir, this lady light o' Love --teach your affection to see with a wiser eye.
the fourth line, undivided, shows a field where there is no game.
i think i've been down this road some time before
current music: i wanted to see you / walking backwards (live@l'Élysée montmartre))
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12:07 am - tgiysdf
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then he fell really in love, which was a grand thing for his crowns, because he lost both thirst and appetite. this love is of the worst kind, because it incites you to the love of diet, during the diet of love; a double malady, of which one is sufficient to extinguish a man.
such was the young gentlemen of whom the good lady had thought, and towards whom she came quickly to invite him to his death.
sunday c
current music: falling over you/is the news of the day (adam live@l'Élysée montmartre)
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| Saturday, July 4th, 2009
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3:50 pm - a modicum of snuff / or / what cost art?
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the commentaries and behind the scenes features for the adventures of baron munchausen, only available since april '08, are terrific and insightful on the practical difficulties of producing art in the extremely collaborative process that is moviemaking. eric idle is hilarious in talking about both what a genius & good friend gilliam is, yet how traumatizing the shooting of the film was. sarah polley addresses this dichotomy as well (both in the dvd & the article below).
but i'll take gilliam's side. he says: i think my priorities are right. i will sacrifice myself or anyone else for the movie. it will last. we'll all be dust.
( long article )
saturday iv vii mmix re mdcclxxvi
current music: stayin up&drinkin in a late night establishment/tellin strangers personal things
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| Monday, June 29th, 2009
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10:59 pm - if i have to dream, i wish i could dream about something besides doing the backstroke!
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the first (bottommost) line, undivided, shows its subject, when the movement approaches, looking out and around with apprehension, and afterwards smiling and talking cheerfully. there will be good fortune.
words that embody things that you may be a part of are "juxtaposition."
words that embody people or things in your periphery are "astronaut, butterfly, electricity, enthusiasm, transformation."
she had been unable to get an answer to any of her numerous calls, and suspected the bell had been removed.
held together by an unexampled concurrence of sentiment, which, is nevertheless subject to change, and which, every secret enemy is endeavouring to dissolve. our present condition, is, legislation without law; wisdom without a plan; a constitution without a name; and, what is strangely astonishing, perfect independance contending for dependance. the instance is without a precedent; the case never existed before; and who can tell what may be the event? the property of no man is secure in the present unbraced system of things. the mind of the multitude is left at random, and seeing no fixed object before them, they pursue such as fancy or opinion starts.
i request all women to imagine for themselves the reflections of which this was the first.
"you are anxious for a compliment, so i will tell you that you have improved her. You have cured her of her school-girl's giggle; she really does you credit."
"thank you. i should be mortified indeed if i did not believe i had been of some use; but it is not every body who will bestow praise where they may. You do not often overpower me with it."
monday xcix
current music: so few come and don't go
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7:20 pm - term of art
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sham relief party
sunday xcix
the whole thing marked a change, very slight yet very perceptible; and though no man could say my master had gone at all out of his mind, no man could deny that he had drifted from his character. it was the same to the end, with his manner and appearance. some of the heat of the fever lingered in his veins: his movements a little hurried, his speech notably more voluble, yet neither truly amiss. his whole mind stood open to happy impressions, welcoming these and making much of them; but the smallest suggestion of trouble or sorrow he received with visible impatience and dismissed again with immediate relief.
to come to the next topic: you may work on the enemy's fears by the various devices of mock ambuscades, sham relief parties, false information. conversely, his confidence will reach an overweening pitch, if the idea gets abroad that his opponents have troubles of their own and little leisure for offensive operations.
but over and beyond all that can be written on the subject—inventiveness is a personal matter, beyond all formulas—the true general must be able to take in, deceive, decoy, delude his adversary at every turn, as the particular occasion demands. in fact, there is no instrument of war more cunning than chicanery; (6) which is not surprising when one reflects that even little boys, when playing, "how many (marbles) have i got in my hand?" (7) are able to take one another in successfully. out goes a clenched fist, but with such cunning that he who holds a few is thought to hold several; or he may present several and appear to be holding only a few. is it likely that a grown man, giving his whole mind to methods of chicanery, will fail of similar inventiveness? indeed, when one comes to consider what is meant by advantages snatched in war, one will find, i think, that the greater part of them, and those the more important, must be attributed in some way or other to displays of craft; (8) which things being so, a man had better either not attempt to exercise command, or, as part and parcel of his general equipment, let him pray to heaven to enable him to exercise this faculty and be at pains himself to cultivate his own inventiveness.
"i can stop if i want to. they amuse me, that's all."
"you can't stop. it's in your blood. it's the jew in you."
"the---- here, i'll show you. i won't do another sketch for a year. i'll prove to you that my ancestors' religion doesn't influence my work, or my play."
then, just as falk was ready to put his hand on him, the man let go his hold and sank like a stone. falk reflected on these sights. his heart revolted against the horror of death, and he said to himself that he would struggle for every precious minute of his life.
without wasting any time in the fruitless indulgence of vexation, i once more set out in search of an abode in which i could hide myself for a few weeks.
current music: set adrift on memory bliss
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| Saturday, June 27th, 2009
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8:24 pm - eggs alone
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a suspicion of a smile dawned in his eyes. i wondered if he ever laughed. i would experiment.
"don't breathe it to a soul," i whispered, tragically, "but eggs, and eggs alone, are turning my love for my sister into bitterest hate."
a-kor might have been ten years younger than he, but such differences in age are scarce accounted among a people who seldom or never age outwardly after maturity and whose span of life may be a thousand years.
'and were they happy together?'
"come," she said, taking him by the hand and leading him into her bedroom. after assuring herself that they were quite alone, she drew from her bosom a soiled and crumpled letter.
"read that," she said, making a violent effort to say the words.
she fell into a chair, seemingly exhausted. while the old man searched for his spectacles and rubbed their glasses, she raised her eyes to him, and seemed to study him with curiosity; then she said in an altered voice, and very softly,--
"i trust you."
saturday xcviii bis
current music: this girl listens to the band play / she says where have you been?!?
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| Thursday, June 25th, 2009
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11:06 pm - it's kind of fun to do the impossible
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then if thou art the food of worms, o virgin of the skies,
how great thy use, how great thy blessing, every thing that lives.
lives not alone nor or itself: fear not and i will call,
the weak worm from its lowly bed, and thou shalt hear its voice.
come forth worm and the silent valley, to thy pensive queen.
the card on the bottom represents thought - the analytical process of organizing the project and capturing the emotional content of the previous card. this is the science or vision of the undertaking. aeon: renewal. optimism in spite of a painful period of change. change. spontaneity. all things are possible. old world seen through new eyes.
the card on the right represents manifestation - the real work involved in completing the project, and the form it will take upon culmination. this is the painting or touch of the undertaking. eight of wands (swiftness): definite movement. progress. a worthy goal. finding a direction in life. development of a new love affair.
the worst of all--the hardest stroke of fate for hepzibah to endure, and perhaps for clifford, too was his invincible distaste for her appearance. her features, never the most agreeable, and now harsh with age and grief, and resentment against the world for his sake; her dress, and especially her turban; the queer and quaint manners, which had unconsciously grown upon her in solitude,--such being the poor gentlewoman's outward characteristics, it is no great marvel, although the mournfullest of pities, that the instinctive lover of the beautiful was fain to turn away his eyes.
the skin of the others was a bluish gray--this one was of a little bluer tinge and the eyes were ringed with bands of white and scarlet, as was its mouth.
from each nostril a band of white and one of scarlet extended outward horizontally the width of the face.
'get off wi' ye!' he growled, with uncompromising gruffness.
no one spoke or moved.
thursday xcviii bis
current music: get a load of you / get a load of me
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10:53 pm - it's close to midnight
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i hope you've got the soul for getting down
thursday xcviii bis
current mood: bad
current music: heartache to heartache, we stand.
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7:36 pm - tell us that you're okay
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what it is
what it was
what it shall be
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| Tuesday, June 23rd, 2009
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7:42 pm - you may have noticed that i'm not all there myself.
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| Monday, June 22nd, 2009
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11:36 pm - seven contemplate nine
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the fourth line, divided, shows one contemplating the glory of the kingdom. it will be advantageous for him, being such as he is, to seek to be a guest of the king.
the fifth line, undivided, shows its subject contemplating his own life. a superior man, he will thus fall into no error.
the card at the top represents one possible mask of your true destination. four of swords (truce): retreat from the battlefield of life. a rest from the conflicts with colleagues or competitors. calm in the storm. self-imposed exile.
"it's the chartreuse that's lacking," commented caraher, lowering at annixter. the other flared up on the instant.
therefore, as every one complains, the course of the world now is such that both young and old are altogether dissolute and beyond control, have no reverence nor sense of honor, do nothing except as they are driven to it by blows, and perpetrate what wrong and detraction they can behind each other's back.
mr. bain (`the emotions and the will,' p. 64) has discussed the "abashed" feelings experienced on these occasions, as well as the stage-fright of actors unused to the stage. mr. bain apparently attributes these feelings to simple apprehension or dread.
monday xcviii
current music: you have ffifty seconds / tell us when to start counting
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12:03 am - e a poe ts
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to think where once my fancy strayed,
i muse on what the years may be
whose coming tales are all unsaid,
till tongs and shovel, snugly laid
within their shadowed niches, grow
by grim degrees to pick and spade,
as one by one the phantoms go.
but then, what though the mystic three
around me ply their merry trade? --
and charon soon may carry me
across the gloomy stygian glade? --
who laughs at a tumble and grins at a bruise?
who climbs over fences and clambers up trees,
and scrapes all the skin off his shins and his knees?
who sometimes comes home all bespattered with blood
that was drawn by a fall? it's that rascal called bud.
yet, who is it makes all our toiling worth while?
who can cure every ache that we know, by his smile?
who is prince to his mother and king to his dad
and makes us forget that we ever were sad?
who is center of all that we dream of and plan,
our baby to-day but to-morrow our man?
sunday xcviii
current music: every time you look in the mirror / you'll see my face
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