one thing i admired about amy winehouse was that defiance.
(with that strength of repetition balaustion recently wrote about)
the tenacity to be true to thine own self, even when the truth hurts.
the subjectively right choice to knowingly make objectively wrong choices. that's free will.
it will be said that it's a shame the world will never see the art she would have made in years unlived, but that's a selfishness. that's something we want for ourselves. selflessly, all that matters is that she lived the life she wanted to live. (some may say that her ability to choose was incapacitated, but as desmond david hume said to charlie, "there's always a choice, brother.") and that defiance, in the face of so many people who are, after all, so very well-intentioned, takes bravery.
i first encountered amy winehouse when she performed rehab on leno's show (one of those rare nuggets i've kept panning a dry bed for) on 24 april 2007. i was so taken with her brilliance that i did not record over the vhs tape recording i'd made of leno's show that night. (this was before i had a dvr and before youtube clips were so prevalent). when i was working on transferring old vhs tapes to digital this year, that was among them. how often do we have a memory of first encounter such as that crystallized? and just like any new artist i fall for, i immediately began quoting her song in my entries.
also in 2007, i encountered (by happenstance) a beloved artist i'd discovered in 1993, meryn cadell, who had, of all things, an lj. it was (certainly one of) my first taste(s) of the shrinking universe bringing artists into closer contact with their audience. meryn hadn't lj'd since april of 2009, but was prompted to write a short post tonight about amy winehouse, mostly to refer back to a previous post wishing a troubled amy well. by coincidence that entry is the entry by which i discovered meryn's lj presence and in which i took the off-topic opportunity to ask about a couple of lyrical mysteries which had always mystified me. i still to this day marvel at the ability to communicate so closely with artists, who had always seemed so (necessarily) distant, as if one would be required to consult an oracle if one deigned to communicate with those immortals.